overthinking the idiot box

Meet the SMRT-TV Staff!
Liz Shannon Miller's parents kept saying she'd ruin her eyes if she sat so close to the TV. Fortunately, she looks cute in glasses. Beyond SMRT-TV, Liz works as a writer of various different media, contributing to websites including Bookslut and Ostrich Ink. In her spare time, she enjoys blogging, knitting, reading, and medium-distance running. She does not get a lot of sleep. Send coffee to liz@smrt-tv.com.
TV Guide has served as Michael Adams's Bible subsitute since he was a child. Michael recently received a bachelor's degree in English, but his ideal job would have him sitting in front of a TV from the time he wakes up to the time he goes to bed. He is currently undergoing treatment for a major obsession with all things related to David E. Kelley. Email him at adams@smrt-tv.com.
Tara Avery is a very interesting person. We don't have a bio for her yet, though, so you'll just have to take our word for it. Email her at tara@smrt-tv.com.
The only survivor of a deadly plane crash, Joel Bergen was raised by television and now lives in L.A. (Little Armenia) with his lovely TiVo and their seven remote controls. For laughs (and filthy lucre), he pisses off anime fans by butchering their favorite shows. When not wallowing in self-loathing and dirty laundry, he thinks about writing and occasionally posts his inner most thoughts at The Pop Culture Petri Dish. Email him at joel@smrt-tv.com.
Alan J. Bloom (a.k.a. Captain Ca$h Milliondollars) is presently a writer for reality television. Having graduated from the University of Arizona in 2001 with BAs in Media Arts and Creative Writing, the South African ex-patriot moved to Los Angeles seeking glamour and fortune, bringing with him a wealth of sports knowledge. Email him at alan@smrt-tv.com.
Mike Celestino is an amateur comedy writer and DVD-phile bouncing back and forth between New York City and Los Angeles on a regular basis. You can contact him at mike@smrt-tv.com or by saying the secret word three times fast.
Paul Cibis hopes to be a real live writer someday. Until that ship comes sailing in in he watches a lot of television and plays the occasional video game. He keeps a blog here and can be reached for comment or lunch at paul@smrt-tv.com.
Consuela Clabby works in San Francisco in a business that has nothing to do with television. She owns a house, a dog, and too many books. When she's not working, she spends her time rock-climbing, reading, writing, and catching up on television shows she missed the first time around. You can reach her at consuela@smrt-tv.com.
Whitney Cox is, of all things, a second-year divinity student who just happens to have a thing for gender and sexuality studies, really good television, and the places where the two intersect. Her more frequent writings on everything from God to politics to video games can be found at ladysisyphus.livejournal.com. Send your own queer readings to whitney@smrt-tv.com.
Andreanna Ditton is a freelance writer and editor living in Los Angeles. We won't mention the other jobs she holds down to pay the bills. She maintains a steady relationship with her roommate, her cats and the life size television in the living room named HAL, which is big enough to talk to but smart enough not to talk back. She's also trying to write a sellable space opera so that the inhabitants of the house, including HAL, can someday live in a house that doesn't leak. Email her at andreanna@smrt-tv.com
When they aren't being fired out of a cannon, The Ashes of Raoul Duke are out covering the death of the New American Dream for Rolling Stone. The Ashes of Raoul Duke know that the only way to get the real story is to become the story, and in the past, they've spent two years undercover with an Oompa Loompa gang in Bethnal Green and several months on the child beauty pageant circuit, culminating in a second place finish at The Gingerbread Pageant in Dallas. Reach him in the afterlife at raoulsashes@smrt-tv.com.
Elana Frink's day job as a publicist requires her to be sort of jaded, so she pretends to have never heard of Stargate Atlantis and then watches it when no one's around. If you work for Adult Swim, feel free to enquire about her idea for a show about genetically modified crime-fighting dogs with thumbs at: elana@smrt-tv.com.
So the legend goes that every time FOX cancels yet another great show, the woebegone howls of Luke Geddes can be heard in the eastern winds. When he's not watching TV, he's thinking about what he's missing. There's a pitiful rumor going around that he has seen every episode of Lizzie McGuire at least twice. He currently resides in Wisconsin, but don't feel too sorry for him. At least he gets to watch prime time an hour or two before you. If you're feeling lonely, he would love for you to e-mail him at: luke@smrt-tv.com.
Richard Jeter is a nomadic novelist and stand-up comedian who uses television to reassure himself that there are people crazier than him in this world. Presently gearing up for both a national comedy tour and a national book release, he has weaned himself completely off of sleep, and is well under way to replacing his entire bloodstream with a more efficient mixture of caffeine and sugar. If you'd like to track the steady deterioration of his mental state, his personal writings can be found at Tales From an Irish Gypsy. He can be reached via richard@smrt-tv.com.
Because he's been on the stage since he was 5, D. Roberts Keenan considers himself an expert on the art of the curtain call. Mr. Keenan holds a B.A. in journalism from Washington State University with a minor in film studies. He has appeared in a movie starring Shirley MacLaine, written a TV pilot no one will ever read and won many karaoke contests. Mr. Keenan is more popular than you, cooks a better cheesecake and can complete a New York Times crossword puzzle "Thursday" without peeking at the answers. He can be reached at roberts@smrt-tv.com.
Bronwyn Lewis moved to Hollywood in August of 2004, and has since then mastered the art of the copier, read many bad scripts, and makes a mean latte. She's spent most of her free time in the last four months at The Jim Henson Company, or at a small management agency in Santa Monica where she crushes aspiring screenwriters' hopes and dreams. She used to read books, and even write, but that was a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. Forward all press inquiries and job offers to her at bronwyn@smrt-tv.com.
Adam Lipkin spends his days working as an instructional technologist at a top 25 university and his nights fighting crime via the subtle technique of writing reviews for such sites as Bookslut and SMRT-TV.com. If he were king of the world, there would be deluxe DVD sets of Freakazoid in every household. He has a wishlist full of box sets and other things he "needs" here, and you can send raves or rants to him at adam@smrt-tv.com.
Erin O'Brien lives in New York City and only wishes life resembled the Manhattan in the TV. She's an editorial type for a major publisher by day, and a freelance writer and editor by... uh, when there's time. She has a cat that plays fetch and she wonders sometimes why she can't find Hostess Orange Cupcakes anywhere in the city. She blogs personally at the fshk blog and also in various other places, including The Advice Blender and Gothamist. You can reach her at erin@smrt-tv.com.
Mike Olson only sleeps in the AM, and it shows. He's a writer in the OC (or as he likes to call it, "Orange County"), as well as a composer/arranger of music, but when he's not wasting time with all of that, he can be found watching British TV series on his region-free DVD player, playing with his Bob and Doug McKenzie action figures, or reading the scripts to The Newsroom. Mike's biggest claim to fame is that his girlfriend was a semifinalist on The Apprentice 2.He can be reached at mikeolson@smrt-tv.com.
When Jenni Powell isn't watching entirely too much reality television, she's probably playing poker or producing poetry. She also digs alliteration. And kittens. She's known to give some good blog at Searching for a Succession Of Unordinary Days. Send red chips, tasty rhymes, and lovable furballs of joy to jenni@smrt-tv.com.
C.J. Quinn is a high-school teacher by day, Smart Young Urban Thing-in-training by night. She has watched T.V. on several continents but now lives in London. She likes salt and vinegar crisps, ridiculously big earrings and daiquiris. Send comments, piles of money and marriage proposals to her at cj@smrt-tv.com.
Kenneth Requa and Doug Spice work in television and new media, but no matter the subject, they sound like they know what they're talking about. They can be reached at kenneth@smrt-tv.com and doug@smrt-tv.com.
Despite having recently acquired a master's in the pompous part of film studies, Katherine Ross's real goal in life is to be a Mighty Pirate when she grows up. Between pillaging runs through the Caribbean, she watches a lot of movies and TV and rants about them to anyone who will listen. She and her TiVo are both excited about their impending move to New York City, though at heart she will always be a Bostonian. All chocolate, rum, and comments will be happily accepted at katherine@smrt-tv.com..
M. Brianna Stallings has never forgiven Jim Henson for not seeing a doctor or David Duchovny for not marrying her. She is currently a desert rat roaming through the post-industrial wasteland that is Albuquerque, NM in search of the perfect carne adovada. Previous writing credits include Ax Wound, Eye Candy, and Zine World. When she's not getting educated or working, she's looking for a few good titles for Embryonic Publications. Email her at brianna@smrt-tv.com.
Jeff Stone can't keep a proper schedule, so he doesn't actually watch a lot of TV. However, the technological wonder of the DVD has allowed him to view many fine shows he couldn't be bothered to follow when they actually aired. He has a square day job that's too boring to talk about, but he does some writing and acting on the side. His other interests include comics, drinking, and kissing beautiful women right on the mouth. Those who can't get enough of Jeff's prattling are encouraged to check out his blog, Listen, Lady.... Send passive-aggressive diatribes to jeff@smrt-tv.com.
Rachel Syme is a freelance writer living in New York City. She miraculously manages to pay for cable every month despite never really having enough cash on hand to pay for a taxi — in other words, she has her priorities straight. She loves shows with yearning doctors, teenagers in angst, competing fashion designers and gawky models, quirky lesbians and poligamists, and a little part of her died the day My So Called Life got cancelled. She has written for Time Out New York, the Brooklyn Rail, Paste Magazine, and New York Magazine, and hopes to actually be able to pay for her cable any day now.
Joelle Tjahjadi's biggest dream is to be a writer, which is why she is currently in the midst of finishing a combined degree in Mathematics and Economics. She is currently accepting any and all offers for jobs, chocolate and money (winning lottery tickets included), and can be reached at joelle@smrt-tv.com.
Alison Veneto talks a lot, more about TV and movies than other things. She blogs about movies at Electric Shadow and writes a bi-weekly column on foreign films at Movie Poop Shoot. She also enjoys dancing, long walks through the forest and cupcakes. Email her at alison@smrt-tv.com.
Jill Weinberger has dabbled in everything from improv to biotechnology. While her ultimate goal is, naturally, world domination, for the moment she's focusing on pursuing a screenwriting career. Her TV and Film scripts can be found in the galleries of www.writesafe.com. Those who prefer snarky reality TV commentary can find her episode summaries at www.planetsocks.com, where she contributes under the super-secret code name "jillybob." Email her at jill@smrt-tv.com.
Justin Winters is kind of important. When he's not saving small kittens from trees, he blogs at dudemanphat and produces life-changing television. Send food stamps or low-carb cookies to justin@smrt-tv.com.